Ask Boxhead!
Now Boxhead is back. Here to dole out advice, answer all your questions, and solve your most pressing personal problems. Not sure what to do or which way to turn? Just ask Boxhead!
Dear Boxhead:
I know you said that you think blogs and bulletin boards are really stupid, but what do you think of Podcasts? That's another new technology, and it seems like you might have a problem with things just because they're new.
Sincerely,
Poddy Podderson of Poddsylvania
Dear Poddy,
I have absolutely nothing against forms of communication just because they're new. If I did, that would make me kind of a closed-minded idiot, wouldn't it? I have issues with blogs and online bulletin boards because most blogs are vainglorious and poorly written, and a great many bulletin boards are inane, juvenile and in some cases pathological. (Get the italics? I'm not saying all, I'm saying most; there's a big difference.) It has nothing to do with them being "new" technology.
Podcasting started off okay, but unfortunately now it's become just another buzzword. I'm all for Podcasting, as long as it doesn't get taken to extremes and it makes sense. What do I mean by "extremes?" Unless you're a company offering informative "how to" type podcasts or you're a news site, what's the point? Again, bells and whistles for their own sake are pointless. Note to media execs and management: doing blogs and podcasts doesn't make you young and hp again. Get it?
But it's someone's right to do whatever they want to online. If a person wants to spend most of their time in an "virtual" world, as opposed to the real world, that's his or her choice. This whole unreal world thing has really gotten too sad for me to discuss. I can't even make fun of it anymore; it literally makes me cry for a lot of different personal reasons. (And you know what happens to soggy cardboard. . .)
Look, people are going to abuse Podcasting the same way they abuse any other kind of technology or online communication medium. But it's not the technology's fault. I say, don't hate the technology, hate the people who sully its good name.
Technology Is Your Friend, But It Shouldn't Be Your Best Friend,
Boxhead
Dear Boxhead:
What do you think of our the Vice President, Dick Cheney, shooting that guy in Texas? And the fact that they didn't tell anyone that it had happened for a long time? Shouldn't they have called the police right away? Don't you think there's more to the whole story than meets the eye? (No pun intended.)
Your friend,
Bill C.
Dear Bill,
Yes, I know for a fact that there's more to the story. I can't say how I know, but I know.
The fact is, they didn't contact the police right away because "the men on the hunting trip, including the vice president, were accompanied by a group of women who were not their wives." That's 100 percent true fact, I swear to God, straight from a source in the evil empire (i.e., the Bush administration.) Well, actually I heard it third hand, but the evil empire person was the original source of the info. Why the "regular" media did not pick up on this, or give it coverage, is beyond me. I guess they really are in the White House's pocket.
Jeez, like there weren't enough reasons not to pal around with Cheney. He's a mean, heartless, philandering bastard, plus he'll also shoot your face off when you least expect it!
Thanks for asking,
Boxhead
PS: How's the "I can be President again vicariously through Hillary if I help her get elected" plan going?
Dear Boxhead:
What do you think of the fact that "Brokeback Mountain" won Best Picture at most of the other awards this year, but it lost to Crash at the Oscars? Especially since Ang Lee did win Best Director. Do you smell a rat?
Just Wondering,
Harvey F.
Dear Haaaavey,
No, I don't smell a rat. I smell a big heaping pile of shit homophobia. Despite the fact that most conservatives think Hollywood is a gay paradise, the fact is that the old-line Hollywood establishment is probably as homophobic as a Baptist congregation in Assback, Alabama. I agree wholeheartedly with Annie Proulx, who criticized the Academy for this slap in the face. She said "It was a safe pick of 'controversial film' for the heffalumps," comparing Academy voters to the elephant-like Winnie the Pooh character.
And for those of you who say I'm overreacting, and it had nothing to do with the fact that the film was about a couple of gay men? I say wake up and get real; stop being a traitor lez or an it-doesn't-affect-me fag. (And don't come crying to me when they come knocking on your door to take you away. )
I'm Here and I'm Queer and I'm Pissed Off,
Boxhead